I also realized that I am in an incredibly bad mood. I have started and stopped writing this post so many times that I'm irritating myself. Mostly I just want to spew obscenities. I want to punch the wall and I want to hide from everyone. Ok, so we all have these kinds of days, but like the methodical person I am, I am going to sit down and write out the reasons and try to find some solutions.
Lately I feel that every decision I have made in my life has been wrong. I question everything. I set goals for myself and when I achieve them they are not what I thought. They don't make me happy. I feel like George Costanza today.
When I took a look at the reasons I am discouraged I realized I'm caught in a catch-22. I want to be able to do dolls full time and make it into a real business because I don't like working for other people making pennies (or pesos as it is). The way to do this is simple; I need to be selling enough dolls to provide myself with a sustainable income.
It's so frustrating that the solution is simple but the application is so difficult. I have spent countless hours researching and have sent about 20 emails so far to children's stores, toy stores, etc asking if they might be interested in carrying BeBe Babies. I have received 0 responses. It leads me to wonder if my emails are going through. I must assume they are. I think the emails are just arriving to uninterested parties. Now that's ok, I'm not emotionally crushed by rejection. It's not the rejection that is making me upset.
I'm upset because I want this so bad, and I want it now. I cannot move forward in any way without orders from stores. For example, I want to order special packaging for my dolls so that when they go to stores they are secure and professional. Most suppliers require you to buy 1000-3000 units minimum. I can't do that until I have orders. I want to hire someone to help me sew and make my dolls. I can't do that until I have the orders. I want to hire someone to really give my website and branding a more professional appearance. I can't do that until I have orders. I want to hire legal services and testing services to take my BeBes to another level and I can't do that until I have orders.
I told you in the past I was thinking about looking into factory manufacturing and an agent to help me. I cannot figure out how to find an agent. A Google search results in representation that looks gimmicky and fake. I'm afraid to go that route but I believe a professional could help me so much more with my goals. I just don't know how to find them.
Many people have told me that stores and/or agents always come to them. But those same people who gave me that information, are tight-lipped about their sources. I have been surprised at the brick wall I have encountered when asking the Etsy community and other small artists for information. This community always came off to me as a place to share and help one another. How quickly that changes when people hit the big time.
So what is the solution when you lose your patience? I believe it is to take a break. Work on something fun and come back with the energy to continue plowing through... And besides what choice do I have? The alternative is even more discouraging...